"She is going to feed us- she is, she is-" My brother whispered
under his breath.. Mai, on the other side, remained silent and as watchful as I.
We had been deep in the Jungle until early today, no food and unsure of
whatever water we found. The three hunters had brought us in here. Now
cleaned up. We sat where we had been put and waited, watching the large,
brightly clad woman bustling about the kitchen. Her back was to us,
and in another second my hand- with a life of its own- was raising up
like a snake. About to strike and pull back with that little piece of fruit
laying cut and ready- right there between the bowls.
15 comments:
Intriguing ending!
I love it when your body parts have minds of their own!!! good read!
oy i bet they were starved...nice tension there at the end...and i be the food will be a great relief...glad they got found as well..
Oh no, not like a snake! Nicely done!
We sat where we had been put
Yep, you captured the hesitancy and unease in the three figures, who certainly seem uncomfortable in this painting...
Well done.
Oh! I can see her hand, rising from under the table. Nice job!
Charming...who could resist that morsel..more to follow, I hope...
Wonderful. It speaks so surely to the truth we see in this painting!
Your words caused me to re-examine Gauguin's painting....I could 'see' everything you wrote.
That would be me! I'd be striking for the fruit, if I'd been in the jungle. Mind you, if you knew me, you'd realize just how outrageous that notion really is.
Nice little piece.
That first line really drew me in...nice write!
You have captured this perfectly. The reader is drawn right in and wants to know what happens after the hand reaches up........so good!
Thanks for giving me a different look at this.
Nicely done!
=)
This is amazing, izzy. As I read it I was reading it as if it were in poetry form. I think, therefore, it is a prose poem...which I admire because I am not sure how to create one! :)
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