They looked around,
no child.
Where had Chyrstal gone ?
Then on the floor by the back door
Mary found the little shell.
" Beach!" She yelled to her husband
and they were off;
over the gritty wooden deck,
leaping onto soft and shifting sand.
Stumbling up to the firmer pack
Mom shaded her eyes- "There John-"
Sure enough the youngster was crouched
intently plucking at something in the damp
as the waves rolled in.
28 comments:
Oh! You are such a wonderful storyteller!
beautifully weaved!
So short but so action-packed and intense!
authentic poem...I could see it and I could believe it
A great deal of drama in a very short story.
I love the discovery in this piece.
Wonderful tale. When at the beach, I have this same strong urge to dig for shells.
lol- Hard to keep little ones away from finding shells at the beach...
so glad they found her! this was a dramatic little tale...
great story- very vivid- I could see your words.
I could feel the panic of the parents - and then the relief.
Mini, as opposed to micro fiction! :)
This is a very enjoyable poem, I liked all of it except the name of the child.
a dreamy image,
inviting word flow.
love to be where you lead us, cheers.
Enjoyed this tiny story in a poem. Captured me and held me in it.
A hunter and gatherer child. Delightful!
Every parent's nightmare, and a very precious child.
— K
Kay, Alberta, Canada
An Unfittie's Guide to Adventurous Travel
Love the visualization of your words. How we all love, even us oldsters, to dig in the cool damp sand. Great job.
QMM
Been there, done that. You describe it so well!
A sweet little Mag Tale
I wasn't certain how your Magpie would end .... happily ever after is good.
Good piece.
you capture the magic of childhood and the sea
A lovely story in poem form. Thank you.
Now there's a scene I won't soon forget for its combination of parental worry/fear and child wonder/no fear. :)
... loved how the anxiety for the safety of the child was strung out until the very end!
Izzy, I got an award :-) I picked you as one to pass it on to. I hope you like it and that it makes you smile. It’s in this post: http://akweelife.blogspot.com/2011/06/irresistably-sweet.html
Dear Izzy: A story conveyed in so few words describes a very salient talent.
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