FF55, Aug. 1 '13 Once again

 You trip over the rails of family traditions
gripping the pails of starch required to straighten and whiten shirts
flip stacks and racks of books searching for facts
rip up requests for soiree's in favor of tennis and standings
unzip the history of this family and turn it inside out
exhaustive microscopic studies, may help...

Mag 179 It is a bird, plane,----

I 'm aiming this car for my brother's house
( to land in his driveway)
It won't raise any higher because of the weight.
A stiff east wind is just right- it ought to make it there
 in an hour or so.
I will now call my best friend and have him Bee-bee gun
the balloons when it gets there to bring it down gently.
 I put a note on the steering wheel-
I want Jim's opinion on which of these 2 hood ornaments
I ought to use.!
( I also included a packet of balloons for return mail )

FF55 Laryngitis

What kid had the temerity to shake my hand
or give a hug- and pass on a slippery slimy bug!

What adult had the lack of manners
 to show up and snap at me " I may not stay-"
Instead of "Hello" and "Nice to see you!"

 maybe the end of our  Friends and Family picnic-






                                                 

Mag 178,July 21 ,'13 REALLY

                                                         Andrew Wyeth


Yeah, I needed a midnight swim-
but I left my clothes right here
on the seat of the bike-
What the heck man ?I can see it now 
 in the police report,
He got arrested, July 20th 2:30 am
for streaking down Main Street on his motorcycle!

FF55, Day after Day

90 million blades of grass
weaving in the heat,
spinning underneath a mower
 Whirrr-rrrr-

Gasping in the hot
grasping at the fence
rolling- RRRR- all
the tall metal frames up-

Splash and Ahhhh-
 into warm pool water      
swish you swim, back and forth
 beneath the blue and gold

 15th day of 2013 Summer Heat Wave   !                             

Mag 177 Sudden Awe

                                          photo by Agustin Berrocal 

Oh the grip of excitement rising!
A finder of ingots laid out before him

He had never seen it in such abundance 
his mind and emotions had him reach for it

before his body could warn him 
it might be molten hot-

FF55, 7/12/13 Starting at 7am, On the 4th

The tent frame went up on the sidewalk
It took 1/2 an hour to locate the top!
We carried table, chairs, coolers and soda
to Main Street.
Fortunately we had shade from a maple
and a breeze to ease 93+ and humidity !
We watched a colorful parade 
and sold stuffed baked potato's for Church.

Mag 176,7/7/13, Swing

                                                                   Supermoon 2013, Julio Cortez, AP 




Reach toward the moon

reach for the stones

carrying sand, mortar-


Light reflecting gently

now down on steel

Soothing, easing night air;


and then the torch

is turned back on 

to help lead everyone home

FF55,7/4/13 Surprise!

We set sail on this journey
months ago
a constant lullaby of

"A-nesting -we-will -go"

Duck Mom is small round  
 brown with black flecks.

Duck Dad is upright
blue grey Indian runner.

 I had given up
Until Monday opening the door
out trundled:  

Five black with blond chests
Five grey with yellow feet     !              

Mag175,6/30/13 Do you Reach

                                                                     image by Musin Yohan



As you follow throughout this day
                                       do you silently match 
                          your movements to hers?
                         Outside to outside
                    action by action
           beauty to beauty,
                bend by bend
trusting fluid competency to bring you both in before the rain

FF55, 6/26/13, Sad but true

A woman drives to Minnesota with her dog  
The hope, the man, the job falls through.
So she comes home.
Only now there is no home, no job,
even family turns her away.
her car need work
Her funds are low.
It is hot, she drives to a lake.
Stays, with her dog, to think...


                                             Where we live there are few shelters.
                                           You would have to go to one of the                                    
                                             larger cities to find one.

Mag 174, Spring

                                                             Stanley Kubrick for Look Magazine, 1949 

20 years later- There was a rag tag scene:

 in the woods by a pond, 

Boat house doors wide open to the night.

Fire outside rather than in.

A keg set on a picnic table

no chairs. 10 or 12 teens hanging out

in the dark, on any given Saturday night.

The bell bottom hip huggers 

with torn and frayed hems

scoop neck Danskin top.

Curly long hair dangling in eyes,

I lit my own Marlboro's-

FF55, 6/21/13. Pleading for Mercy

To have a kind relaxed eye,
an open mind
and willing heart
after struggling
to undo a lifetime of knots.
" I am just so tired"
A black man says,
"The tension and watchfulness
we hold against
the world each day."
He says." Constantly
being questioned on
purpose and intention."
Our presence,
Who are you and why ?


                                         Another interesting essay from July issue of The Sun;
                                       covering a black Professor and writer.
                                       I can so relate to this on a gut level .

Mag 173, Smile

                                                    The Promenade, 1918, by Marc Chagall 

Today we shall walk 

and sway together 

you and I,

Soon we may 

skip and dance 

together you and I;

As time goes on 

My dear-we may even fly together

you and I, we may fly

FF55 6/14/13, Please help me remember!

" Stand up straight-" Chucks me under the chin.
"And speak only when spoken to-"

 I was lucky to get a whiff        
of my Mother's perfume, 
or a quick press of hands
as my parents sailed out the door.

Gone were lullaby's
stories, back rubs before sleep ...

"Don't forget to practice on those you love, today!" 


                                      

Believe it or not
 When you were raised by arms length parents, 
You have to try and remember to reach out 
and touch; even ask for hugs!

Mag 172, When all are gone without

There is a certain click-
of sneakiness
The-Oh-so-slow
and careful turning of a latch
When you are young
and want to know!

What is on the bed,
or in the desk-
I loved to tiptoe
over creaky farm house floors,
(these were grey in uptairs halls)
and walk the certain edge of steps

to attic rooms
in breathless heat;
to kneel and peer beneath
the fringe of iron bedstead
then held my breath

as painted candy box
was lifted so as not to scrape
 carefully both thumbs
 pried up the lid
 to view treasures
 laid within bright walls of gold

FF55, I never cut flowers,

Yet maybe they will forgive
 me for my selfishness-

From subtle folds of bounty's reach
my peony's are blessing me

with a scent so rich
It glides as far

as roses can on butcher block,

from yellow kitchen to the dining
room they clasp their hands

and seal my mood
into velvet peace and gratitude


                                               



                                               

                                             

FF55 5/31/13, Just one more thing, at 6pm

 Story about a dragon
a basic typewriter,
"Could you write a report for me ?"        

bags, blocks of books
octagon of shiny red presents
(that kept getting kicked over)    

young people
scurrying and laughing
before a party.  

I need the gate,
my partner
to drive everything
to a farm to
care for goats overnight !      



                                                          Quite the dream! Love my foster daughter, but-
                                                     * PHEW* -wipes her brow-
                                                      This felt a bit insane.

FF55 On Bias and Body Language

Fences don't
just keep
horses in
or horses out

They can be
an arrogant barrier
for an insecure instructor.

" Do this---do it THIS way"
Because I am right...
"Those of you who have
learnt this from other people
are wrong."

If you do not have
enough money for me today
So sorry I can't help you -

   

                                                      Thank God I do not run into many folks like this-
                                                   I walked away from this clinician and do not
                                                   plan to go back ever!
                         

Mag 168 Ho-Hum

                                           

photo by Togan Gokbakar 

                         " What's that you say George ?"                    
                          " The president he said that Marie, I promise! It is in the paper
                       I'll show you as soon as we are on the train."
                        " More Taxes ? Don't they charge a body enough for
                      moving, eating, breathing?"
                           " Of course they do-it is pretty much the same everywhere."
                              " Not where our Martha lives! they have it good up there-"
                        " It is cold where Martha lives- you don't want to go there Marie,
                     be real."
                         " I just want to take that river cruise- the Fjords and all, the one that
                     was advertised in the paper a month ago, remember ?"
                         "Well start saving some more pennies Marie-Savings rates don't help
                    much at all anymore. -Here is the train, Let's try and get a seat on
                    the far side this time, Ok ?"

                       

                     
                               

FF55 Errand of mercy today

And so it is, Nature
runs her course of live
and die-

I almost lost a duck
to a hawk,
then I lost a duck
to a weasel

I advertised on line
3 emails , 6 days
and MANY tries later;  

I stood with my husband
in front of a bookstore
until  2 Drakes finally arrived !
                     
                                   
                                              My little hen and the 2 boys are out there negotiating!
                                             They have been talking and dotting i's crossing t's
                                             for at least half an hour!

Mag 167, May 5'13 , Helpless

                       Young Woman Picking the Fruit of Knowledge, 1892 by Mary Cassatt

                                       " Do you know what you are doing ? really?
                                   Alicia, I wonder..Come down please!" 
                                   I said this to the young woman who
                                   had chosen to climb into the beautiful,
                                   blooming fruit tree.
                                   Pink blooms, pink dress- All ready for her
                                   graduation ceremony!
                                     She says it was because the lovely scent-
                                   I worry for the bees! If she gets stung
                                   we will be in the Hospital, not at the school!
                                     

FF55, 4/25/13, We are, what % Water ?

Have you heard
"I Love you "
and other wonderful
hummed songs,
make beauty!

Haven't you learned
it is far better
than yelling
and other hateful alarms ?

Yes
Dr. Emoto has
proven a theory
by freezing water crystals
and photographing them!

The ones sung
love songs,
are gorgeous,
the ones yelled at
look tight and squished !

                                       
                                                 If you don't believe me go do a search
                                                  No wonder stress knots us up-                                              
                                                   I am singing my cells lullaby's
                                                  now, whenever I can remember to!

Mag166, 4/28/13 Such Is Life

                                                            illustration by Helen Ward 



           "  Sometimes, just as you think things are settled
Happy and comfortable-
a sound, a movement, or an unexpected visitor
Arrives; and topsy-turvy  goes the plan!"


                                                         ( I can so relate to this right now-
although my stage has less players on it-and I am the primary one that is disturbed!)

FF55, 1/25/13 Mysterious Electrical Mishaps

Our poor orange dragon
 has crouched in its cave
for two weeks with
Its mouth agape.
     
The fins and gills had come off.
a molar came out,
a secondary heart was removed
and replaced.

Yesterday my slimmer fingers
were the dentist of restoring
by feel-the bolt
and box for regulating pulse.

tightening all, restored power!


                                               Tractors and dragons are very touchy patients-
                                 Notoriously delicate and refined in their connections
                                 and grounding  mechanisms  !
                                                
                                           
                                                    

Mag165, 4/21/13, On Impulse

                                                              Monhegan's Schoolteacher, 2004 by Jamie Wyeth 






 It was a moonlit night, she could not sleep.
In her journal she had written a henna rinse 
recipe for her hair. What a perfect opportunity! 
  Close to midnight she sat by the window
drying her hair with a soft cloth. Reading the
following paragraph in the original book;
she became concerned.It mentioned a little known
herb- that was also difficult to find. 
Oh my I hope this rinse works well without it
There was mention that sunlight could turn hair 
orange in some instances...

FF55, 4/19/13, Once Upon An Easter,

I could lie-
and tell you Easter was eating and eating
jelly beans and chocolate eggs!

I was going to Church,
but ended up constructing
a storage cabinet for my sister in law.

At lunch, there was an easel
covered in paper. 2 year old Gabby
and I took turns with crayons,chalk and markers!

Mag164, 4/14/13, The Promise

                                                       Spring, 1935 by Kuzma Petrov-Vodin 



Yes we climbed all the way up here on this beautiful day- 

and now I would really like to relax and enjoy the view!

So if you don't quit leaning and leering at me, I am going 

to haul out and slug you in a second!

FF55, 4/12/13, Explore and Expand

                    Building an axis,
                    Maybe you will use your breath
                    to walk down the wide spiral stairs

                     from our attic to a broad entrance hallway.
                     It is luminous and warm here,
                     and encircles us with peace.

                    Then we can go downward again
                    past the belly button window
                    onto the pelvic floor
                    and a hammock for being.
                 

                                                       

                                   Been reading an interview in the April issue of Sun Magazine;
                                     Regarding balancing more being than doing. Very interesting
                                              article" Out of our heads" Phillip Shepard.

Mag 163 , 4/7/13, By Mistake

                                                          Woman With a Towel, 1898, Edgar Degas


                Elise was quite self conscious and I walked in on her one day; just after the doctors had allowed her back brace to be removed.
              "Hal!" she remonstrated me- wrapping the glorious towel up to her chin, " Why didn't you knock?!"
               " I am so sorry" I scrambled and ducked out of the room very quickly, my face very hot I am sure!
The glorious hair and generous figure stuck with me- to the point of my having to attempt a
pastel sketch for myself, which I kept tucked carefully away in a desk drawer, under some books.
                She never said another word to me about it, but every time I ran into her at the florist I swear her cheeks got a little rosier too!

FF55, 4/4/13 Alive, Alive!

Red buds are topping trees!
 I rode my horse
this afternoon;
now all I know 

If you would flow,
float, or glide,
you must unknot -    
  
To be at peace
you must sigh, fly,
swing wide and love.

To love you must
accept, forgive
and smile

as life goes on
like water
no one can hold 

Mag 162, 3/31/13, Highlight

                                             Between Heaven and Hell, 1989 by Jacek Yerka

                               The cat's yellow eyes ought to have opened a bit wider - his timing
                               was off. There has been a flash of the ordinary being stretched.
                               A shift, a flutter - an interruption happening. A breath caught.The
                          universe has come up with an opportunity beyond what we know...

FF55, 3/29/13 Renewal

A tiny round
piece of moss- very green,
stood out in the woods.
I drove by and felt
a lift of hope in my heart.  

Later, tears washed over eyes
as my heart separated
out woven conflicts;
days of confusion ended.

A name found,
and tension melted
wings of flat rock
basking in sun     

Mag 161, 3/24/13 Half or Less

                                                  Not to be Reproduced, 1937 by the Belgian surrealist René Magritte



                                        " I have turned away from you, self
                                 I do not accept the choices you have made
                                at this moment!      
                                A school child has no right to say such things
                                 to the heart of ourself! and I will not 
                                look back with acceptance or forgiveness-
                                 will not restore eye contact or recognition;
                               until you truly restore faith in your word ! "
                             

FF55 3/22/13, With a Friend,Monday

There was wind, fumes and many cars.
Piles, piled up :14 rims.

Free and clear engines, tipped this way and that. 
The mechanics were only disassembling.

A man carried a door, overhead.
One wagon was chock full of twisted tubes.

The map led us to the right year, wrong make.
No gas pedal assembly here !

Mag160 , 3/16/13 For Only One Instant

                                                      Faun, Horse, and Bird, 1936, Pablo Picasso

                           
                                                    
                                                Are they all having a good laugh-
                                         The bullish devil, is picking at his teeth-
                                         envisioning a meal of that bird. A fowl
                                         who has an eery, squeaky voice,
                                         with the horses laughter chiming in
                                         a less shrill tone.
                                         As luck will have it, the Phoenix
                                         rises quickly from a puff of ash and flame;
                                         and the horse is taken to carry Death
                                         along the dark of river Styx-
                                         Then only the Minotaur remains
                                         left to wander the endless hedges
                                         of a labyrinth- on an Island
                                         dimmed well by mythic fog.

FF55 3/15/13, Silly Tune

Spring fling,
flap jack
Hi by
laugh cry
dry eyed- I spy
hippity hop,
flipity flop

I wish I may -I hope I'm not- 
a fish out of his bowl,
a fat mole
away from his hole
hunted and cold

by a bold cat,
in a song I sing
under a bird
on the wing-

                                          Cabin Fever rages around here, this is one small
                                    temporary cure while skipping- through snow,mud-

Mag 159, 3/10/13, Adieu

                                                    Meal Beach, Burra Isles, Shetland by Robin Gosnall



I cradled the young bird carefully, she was finally all cleaned off from the oil.
 "Restore her to freedom " And so we walked the few more feet
to the waters edge and set her carefully down
by the foam running in joyously to greet us.
"There girl, off you go!" She wasted no time to be aloft
on the swell and it drew her back out
 onto the gleaming bluegreen.
We waved and in response she began ducking
and diving in search of her first free meal in quite
sometime.

FF55,3/8/13, Mystery and Maze

I love the solid comfort
 of numbers you can hold
coins, blocks.
And word problems:

 4 apples at 16 cents-       
Or a car traveling 45 miles an hour
going 90 miles from
Sandyhook to Millersville -

And I liked measuring
more than scary insubstantial
formulas of geometry,
trig and calculus
How did I ever pass them?



                                            Never saw a way out of the maze.
However thanks to many tutors all through College I made it!

Mag 158, 3/3/13 No Doubts

                                                                 photo by TheFoxAndTheRaven


"You are close to useless" I hissed, my breath heaving.
" I have been saving your ass for too long! "
I turned away in disgust.

After another moment I began to hear
whimpers from the heap on the floor.
I amm- sorr-y-" It was barely audible.

"Yeah I know full of remorse but not enough to get help; or stay with it!"
I spat at her crossing my arms tightly. I knew I should leave
but I didn't dare not till she showed a little more alertness.

"Here dry yourself before you catch your death-" I flung a lavender
towel at her. It sat untouched on her shoulder for a few moments
before a quivering hand grabbed at it and began rubbing.

"This is absolutely the last time I bale you out Amber!
You're going to have to get into a Halfway house and
really go to those meetings!"

I saw a slight nod. "I'll call Michael if you want a ride
tomorrow, but then I am done and you are on your own."
I turned on my heel and left

my younger sister on the bathroom floor
where I had unceremoniously dumped her
after the cold, sobering shower.

FF55 3/1/13 How Many Blacksmiths ?

Grey is down in speckles and stones
A carriage propped for two wheels

A horse foot raised, rasped,
near a fire and bellows.  

A Silo needs its cap,
four yellowy houses are framed.

Church has half its steeple.
Orange fields are begun

Red trees curving,
Blue sign stretches

along a big barn
with white doors.



 
                                                       It has been an exceedingly dingy, wet week.
One thing to detest about the end of Feb....However this puzzle has lifted my spirits
on several occasions! There are two burly Blacksmith's in this picture-maybe they are brothers ?

Mag 157, 2/24/13. Venus

                                                                                  Venus de Milo with Drawers, 1936, Salvador Dali


     " I can save and use the best of the best ?
 Take it out and wear it whenever I want!
Qualities like beautiful thoughts,
gliding motions, adequate cleavage,
good heart, a slim,smooth belly? 
A shot of Eternal Youth ? -Wow I'll take it !"

FF55 Formations of Poetry

Stop listening to outer coming in,
watch your own consciousness!

"Language is not where we start thinking"
: Imagination.

We have fundamental thought processes
that are 'prelinguistic.'

It is biological to learn language,
master complex syntax

From : cultural shaping and 'wild systems'.
Cannot be intellectually mastered.

 Language is self managing and self shaping,   
descriptive comes after...


  
                                  
  Between meditation and writing,              
he fishes and hunts up some very interesting elements.
Well worth reading!
A poet and zazen Buddhist-Gary Snyder.      
  Concepts from a portion of an Interview with the Paris Review .                                                         
       The Gary Snyder Reader, The Art of Poetry . pgs.328-9.
( paperback )c.2000, Counterpoint, member of the Perseus Books Group.

Mag 156 Without Exception

                                                                    Wind of History by Jacek Yerka           




                                                The white house road came along from the otherside!
                                           I sit now, writing from the morning room on the south
                                          end of my Grand parents home.
                                                The old white car has sunk into its inevitable,
                                          deepening rut. The house helpers had been told
                                          " No matter what- come in from the main gate side!"
                                          Springtime, ice, wind, snow, rain- " Do not use
                                          the common road!" My Grand father had built his own
                                          approach .To enhance the view. To show off the property
                                          to its best advantage!  With the lovely fan of trees.
                                               Even though the gate has now fallen over
                                          and the stone wall with its urns and original decor
                                          are tumbled and crumbled - you can still hear his
                                          edict- as if on the wind " Come to the circle driveway,
                                          we shall meet you at the door !"

FF55, 2/15/13, Daily bread

       A handful of beautiful clear colored chips
held out as a fan of playing cards.
Fiery hell to enlightenment                  
and everything in between!
We may pass dark hunger,
anger to rapture. A day interwoven
white tranquility, toned into laziness at times.              
heat from animality to hell,
purple learning into violet realization.
Overlapping kaleidoscope of galaxies
 to inner worlds.



                I cannot say I am attached to this set of
beliefs over another- however I am reading a book called
 "The Buddha in your rear view mirror" Quite appealing
 in the sense this school does not ask you to change your
stripes- or spots- as many Spiritual paths often do- No pretzels!  

Mag 155, 2/10/13, One Morning.

                                                                        artwork by Joseph Lorusso        



    'Good idea!' She hadn't done a painting around colors in a while.The
last one had been reds and ended up as flowers in a swamp scene.
    Here she was out for a cup of java at her local diner. A young couple
decided to relinquish their hold on privacy across from her, just after she
 sat down. Maybe they are making up after a few days of conflict.
She flipped over a piece of paper and began to sketch. 'Yes, yellow, cream 
and tans with hints of reflection ought to be enough challenge- She got the
major elements in place. 'Ok- maybe I can snap a photo for color purposes-
before she opens her eyes! She checked to make sure the flash wouldn't go
off alerting the couple to her plans. After all this is not gay Paris-'...


                                                 



                                           

FF55, 2/8/13, Under bright blue skies .

A broad road, bordered by scruffy poplars

and pines.Nestled between trees, I find

a large round speckled boulder that I lean

against.A tremor rises violently

behind me and I leap away.

It splits and I face a glossy nose

and huge eyes of a baby dragon .

"What"- I gasp, "Shall I feed you?"



                                    

2/6/13, Poets United, Simply

Love it
love it energetically
love it energetically colorful
love it energetically colorful shapely
love it energetically colorful shapely flowers
love it energetically colorful shapely flowers springtime!

FF55, 2/1/13, Sleuthing

They found his car.
After, two sister's comb
their brothers apartment.

Almost by magnifying
and dusting for fingerprints.
No strong box of papers.

Cleaned out his place in three hours
left food and furniture
for the next person .

A book and life twist
with dreams for me.
Leaving dry, hollow
corn husks, of deer and human.

               
                                               
   
                   Truth, my friends don't know why he died
              at his friends house. They don't know why
              someone made off with his papers...No money to take.
              ...Autopsy will tell most, Police can't do much more.